Friday, June 5, 2009

While I finish part II of the last post...

Found on Jezebel, this video has proven the shining rainbow highlight of my morning. Picture this: Joe Jonas on the stand in Tranny Court. He's been sworn in on the latest issue of XY magazine. Drag Queen acting as presiding judge. Me, fitted pantsuit and outrageously-neon stilettos, prosecutor. Keep in mind that the Jonas Sisters not only act as though they're 'waiting for marriage' with those vending-machine promise rings, but continue to uphold the laughably ludicrous farce that they're 'straight.' Ha! I smell incest porn within five years. Oh, don't feign discomfort--it's totally ethical, as long as they just jerk off next to one another on a couch (with an American Flag blanket laid along the back, of course) without touching! That's what xtube tells me, anyhow. I give you, ladies and gentlemen, exhibits A, B, C, and GLBTQIIBBQ.

Joe Jonas needs a dildo!

Do I even need to proclaim that I rest my case? Not only have I done the 'Single Ladies' routine better (while blackout drunk, no less), I've managed to do it...less gay than Joe Jonas does here, even as he purports to do so in a self-consciously and clumsily 'straight' way. The least he could do is get a fiercer pair of heels and shave that damn crustache!

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